Sex, Not Love Read online

Hunter shook his head. “I just want to fuck you—make you forget what’s broken for a while.”

  “You’re really vulgar.”

  “Maybe. But I’m honest. I don’t know what your deal is with your ex, but I’m guessing the reason you’re leery of men has to do with him not being so honest.”

  Of course, he was right—Garrett had cut me deep. Trust was like glass. When it broke, it shattered, and even if you managed to glue it all back together again, there were always fissures. It was never as strong as when it was whole.

  “How about if we go out to dinner for your birthday as friends—no expectations of sex. We’ll just share a nice meal and call it a night. I’ll even pay for dinner.”

  “Fine. But you’re not paying for dinner. That’s a deal breaker. I pay for dinner, or you can find someone else to not have sex with after the meal.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. Extending my hand, I said, “You drive a hard bargain, birthday boy. It’s a deal.”

  Hunter took my hand to shake, but then used it to yank me flush against him. He kissed my forehead. “I drive lots of things hard. And just because I agreed to no sex doesn’t mean you’re off the hook for another round of kissing and dry humping.”

  “I can’t wait.” I laughed as if I was joking, but there was a lot of actual truth in my statement.

  ***

  Caroline Margaret Weiner was born at 3:47 a.m., after eighteen hours of labor. I’d watched plenty of movies where the new dad runs out in his blue scrubs and says the baby is born, but actually being part of that in real life was nothing short of magical. Derek had the blue paper mask and hat on when he walked out with his eyes full of tears.

  “It’s a girl.”

  He’d barely gotten the three little words out before the tears started flowing. There wasn’t a dry eye in the room after that.

  Even though I’d sworn I was never going to have children of my own after my life fell apart over the last few years, a tiny crack ran up the impenetrable wall I’d built around my heart when I saw Anna’s baby in the nursery. After another hour of waiting, we took turns going to visit the new mommy.

  Apparently Derek hadn’t told his wife I’d flown in for the shower. And since I’d told her I wasn’t able to make it, she was quite surprised when I walked in.

  “You’re here! You’re really here!”

  “Thank God I am. If I hadn’t come in for the shower, I would have missed this.” The two of us clung to each other, crying tears of joy, until a nurse knocked at the door. She had the baby in a clear carrier on wheels.

  “Time for Mommy to show off her beautiful bundle of joy,” the nurse said. She locked the wheels on the portable bassinet and gently lifted baby Caroline out. The precious little thing was swaddled so all I could see was her sweetest, little pink face.

  While the nurse settled Anna with extra blankets and a pillow to prop the baby up on, I walked to the sink and washed my hands, then pumped some disinfectant on them as an added precaution. The minute the nurse shut the door behind her, I climbed into bed next to my friend.

  “Oh my God. She’s beautiful. She looks just like you.” I unglued my eyes from the beautiful newborn and looked at my lifelong partner in crime. “You have a baby.”

  “I have a fucking baby,” she said.

  I laughed. “I don’t think you should say that word around my sweet niece.”

  Her smile wilted. “You were supposed to have one at the same time and live next door so we could wheel them in carriages like we did our dolls when we were little.”

  I stroked the baby’s cheek. Her skin was so soft. “Maybe I can see about getting my ex-husband relocated to a West Coast penitentiary so I can move out here. Do you think they make extra-large carriages? I’m sure Isabella won’t mind if I stuff her in one and wheel her around with you.” I leaned in and smelled baby Caroline. “God, she smells so good.”

  We huddled in the bed in our own little world, so we didn’t hear Derek or Hunter enter the room. It was Hunter’s voice that announced their presence.

  “Did you just sniff the baby?”

  Derek chuckled. “She sniffs everything.”

  “I do not.” I totally do.

  Intrigued, Hunter walked to the bed. “What does she smell like?”

  “Baby,” I said.

  Hunter squinted at me, then leaned forward and inhaled a giant whiff of Caroline.

  Derek was amused. “God, I hope my kid decided to try out her diaper a minute ago.”

  The nurse who had wheeled the baby in came back and interrupted our sniff fest. “Are we ready to see how Caroline does latching on?”

  Anna nodded. She looked nervous. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

  “The first few times can be a little frustrating, so why don’t I go grab you a support pillow and some breast pads while you say goodbye to your friends. They can go to the waiting room, and I’ll come get them when you’re done, if you want.”

  “No. That’s okay,” Anna said. “They need to go home and get some rest. They’ve been here all night. Why don’t you guys go sleep and come back tonight if you feel up to it.”

  I really was exhausted. And I was certain Anna needed sleep more than I did. “Okay.”

  “I’ll give you my keys,” Derek said.

  I’d completely forgotten that my plan had been to stay with Anna and Derek after the shower. It would be weird to stay there without Anna home. Plus, they needed their privacy now that they’d have a newborn at home for the first time.

  “That’s okay. I’m going to check into a hotel.”

  “Don’t be ridiculous. Stay at our house. Derek will be here most of the time until I come home anyway.”

  Hunter piped in. “I’ll make sure she has a place to stay.”

  “Are you sure?” Anna questioned.

  “Positive. We’ll all get some rest and come back later to visit.”

  Anna yawned. “Okay.”

  “Bye, beautiful baby girl.” I caressed Caroline’s cheek one last time and stole one more sniff.

  ***

  “Do you know of a place nearby where I can stay?”

  “Sure do.”

  I leaned back into the leather seat of Hunter’s pickup and closed my eyes. “I haven’t stayed up this long since college. My body actually aches from lack of sleep. I feel old.”

  “We’ll get you some sleep, and you’ll feel as good as you look in no time.”

  I mumbled something about him being a charmer and told myself that closing my eyes for three minutes wouldn’t hurt. The next thing I knew, I was being lifted out of Hunter’s truck. I blinked my eyes into focus. “Where are we?”

  “My house.”

  “You were supposed to take me to a hotel.”

  “No. You asked if I knew a place nearby, and I said yes. I do. My place.” He used a foot to swing the truck’s door shut.

  “I’m not staying with you.”

  “It’s six o’clock in the morning. Check in at hotels is the middle of the afternoon. Even if I found a place with a vacancy—which in this area is not as easy as it sounds—you’d have to wait to check in or pay for last night when you didn’t sleep there.”

  He had a point. But still… “I can’t stay here.”

  “I have a guest room. You can crash in there for a few hours. I’ll take you to a hotel this afternoon, if that’s what you want. But I have plenty of room, and you’re welcome to stay.”

  A part of me wanted to argue. But the man had been shuttling me around since he’d picked me up from the airport, and he had to be as exhausted as I was.

  “Okay. But no funny business.”

  Hunter grinned. “Never.”

  Chapter 9

  Natalia

  A warm stream of light shining directly into my eyes woke me up. Disoriented, I had no idea where I was or what day it was. I sat up in the comfy bed and looked around the familiar room until the morning came back to me. Hunter’s house. I’d left my phone in my purse, which was s
till in the kitchen—I think—and there was no sign of a clock in the guestroom. So after a quick trip to the ensuite bathroom, I headed out to quietly retrieve my cell, hoping not to wake Hunter if he was still sleeping.

  Only…Hunter was definitely not sleeping.

  I froze as I turned the corner from the bedroom hallway to the open kitchen and living room. He stood with his back to me at the stove, cooking what smelled like bacon—shirtless, while dancing to Billy Joel.

  As far as wake-ups go, this view was up there. Hunter wore gray sweatpants that hung low on his narrow waist, and the muscles in his back rallied together to form a V that led up to broad shoulders. There was no doubt the man worked out—a lot. I stood in silence, taking in the way his hips swayed to the music and remembering how good his rhythm was when we’d danced together at Anna’s wedding. Damn.

  “Hope you’re not a vegetarian. I don’t make tofu anything, especially not bacon.” I jumped at the sound of his husky voice. He’d never turned around to see me, and still hadn’t when he spoke.

  My heart raced in my chest. “You scared the crap out of me.”

  He finally turned around. “Me? I didn’t sneak up on you while you were frying hot bacon to ogle your ass.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “I wasn’t ogling your ass.”

  “It’s okay. I don’t mind.”

  “I wasn’t ogling your ass.”

  Hunter turned back around to the stove, reached up to the cabinet on the right to grab a dish, and then used tongs to pick the bacon from the frying pan.

  “The more we deny the truth, the more power it has over us.” He set the plate on the table before returning his attention to me with a cheeky grin. “On second thought, keep denying it. It’ll just make you focus on it more.”

  “You’re really a big ass, you know that?”

  Hunter held a hand to his ear. “What’s that? You really dig my ass?”

  “Are you always this obnoxious in the morning? No wonder you live alone.”

  “It hasn’t been morning for hours. It’s almost three o’clock. Come. Sit and eat. Your eggs will be done in a minute.”

  “Three o’clock?” I walked to the table forgetting about his ass comment. “I slept the entire day away.”

  “You needed it.”

  He poured a mug of coffee and held it up to me. “Cream and sugar?”

  “Yes, please. I can’t believe how long I slept. What time did you wake up?”

  “Around eleven.”

  Hunter brought me coffee. “Thank you.” As he handed it to me, my eyes did an involuntary sweep of his chest. It would have been fast and harmless, had the jackass not watched me do it. God, the man didn’t miss a beat. He quirked a brow and smirked.

  “Shut up. Go put some clothes on if you don’t want me to look.”

  “I never said I didn’t want you to look.”

  “What are you, a peacock? Walking around fanning your tail feathers, trying to attract a female?”

  “That’s not a bad idea. Let me show you my tail.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “Let’s start over. Good morning, Hunter.”

  His smile was genuine. He nodded. “Good morning, Natalia.”

  “Did you sleep well?”

  “I did. You?”

  “I can’t remember the last time I was out that cold. That bed is really comfortable.”

  “I’m glad you enjoyed it. Just an FYI, the one in the master bedroom is the same model if you’d like to try it out next.”

  I shook my head. “You just can’t help yourself, can you? It always comes back to sex.”

  He chuckled and went to the stove to get the eggs. “I spoke to Derek a little while ago. He said Anna and the baby are doing great, and they’ll probably go home tomorrow morning.”

  “Wow. So fast. I think I’d want a few days at the hospital for people to take care of me before I went home.”

  “Derek will take good care of her.”

  “You’re right. I forget she has an amazing husband.” I scoffed. “I forget they exist sometimes.”

  “Derek told me you were divorced. That was about all I could get out of him.”

  “Derek is a gentleman. He goes by the say nothing if you don’t have anything nice to say rule, so I’m sure he had nothing extra to say about Garrett.”

  “You mentioned something about prison this morning. What happened, if you don’t mind me asking?”

  “I’ll give you the short version. Married after six months of dating. Lived the American dream in a penthouse with a gorgeous, wealthy man. He was arrested three years later for securities fraud, and I saw none of it coming. I was blindsided in every way. He left me with more than my annual salary in debt that he’d racked up in my name and as the sole caregiver of his then-thirteen-year-old daughter who hated me. I’m still working to get both under control two years later.”

  “Jesus.”

  “Yeah.” I was anxious to change the subject. “Do you know what time visiting hours are?”

  “3:30 to 5:30 and 6:30 to 8:30. But Derek said to try to come up for the afternoon hours because he has some big surprise dinner being delivered from Anna’s favorite restaurant at 6:30.”

  “He’s so sweet. I guess we should get going soon then. I was hoping to check into a hotel and shower before we went back to visit, but I don’t think we’ll have time.”

  “You’re welcome to shower here. And stay as long as you want. I have an early flight out tomorrow morning for work up north anyway, so you’d have the place to yourself after tonight.”

  “That’s very nice of you. Maybe I’ll take you up on the shower if you really don’t mind. And then I can find a hotel after we visit the hospital.”

  “After dinner, you mean?”

  “Dinner?”

  “My birthday dinner. You agreed to have dinner with me.”

  “God. I totally forgot. It seems like that conversation was a week ago instead of this morning. It’s still your birthday?”

  “Yep. But I’m passing the torch to baby Caroline after today. Thirty is the last one I celebrate. After this, it’s all hers. So you’re going to help me celebrate the very last one I get.”

  “That’s a lot of pressure. Now I feel like I’m going to have put on a dress and be entertaining and witty.”

  Hunter winked. “Feel free to make that dress cut low in the front and showing off a lot of leg.”

  ***

  “You look beautiful, Natalia.”

  After we visited the hospital, Hunter had dropped me off at a hotel so I could check in and get ready for dinner.

  “Thank you.” It was the second time he’d complimented me since he’d picked me up. Even though he liked to tease me about sex—some of which was not really teasing—I was somehow certain his praise was sincere tonight. “You don’t look bad yourself for a man in his thirties.”

  “Take it easy. I’m about eight hours into my thirties.”

  The waitress came to our table. “Can I start you off with something to drink? Tonight’s special drink is a coconut margarita. It has fresh cream of coconut, lime juice, Cointreau, and Patrón tequila. The glass is lined with salted, toasted coconut.”

  “Mmmm. That sounds delicious. I’ll try one of those,” I said.

  Hunter ordered a Coke.

  “What? It’s your birthday. Your last birthday. Aren’t you going to join me for a drink?”

  “I’m driving, and I have a 6 a.m. flight.”

  I turned to the waitress. “Can you make a virgin coconut margarita?”

  “Sure can.”

  “He’ll have one of those. And put an umbrella or something in it. It’s his thirtieth birthday.”

  She smiled and looked to Hunter for approval to change his order.

  He chuckled. “That’s fine. Thanks.”

  After she walked away, I looked around at the rooftop Mexican restaurant. The view of a twinkling L.A. was breathtaking.

  “This place is great. Do you come here o
ften?”

  “First time.”

  “Really? I would think this place would be in your dating arsenal—impressive restaurant with a view and a long drink menu on top of a hotel. It’s like a playboy’s one-stop-shopping dream. Couple of drinks…grab a room…”

  “I prefer to keep a mattress in the bed of my pickup. It’s cheaper and easier to dump them off when I’m done.”

  I laughed. “Smart.”

  “You know I’m not really a whore.”

  The waitress delivered our drinks, so I sipped mine. It was the most delicious drink I’d ever tasted—like a melted, toasted coconut ice cream bar.

  “Really? So how many women have you dated in, say, the last month?”

  He thought about it for a minute. “Three.”

  “Hmph. That’s not so bad, I guess.” I sipped my drink again and squinted at him. “Unless you slept with all of them. Sleeping with three different women a month would be thirty-six a year…after ten years of singlehood that would be upwards of three hundred and sixty different women. That’s kinda gross.”

  Hunter frowned.

  I smirked. “Slept with ’em all, huh?”

  “I travel a lot for work. Sometimes I spend the better part of three months on a job site out of state, so I don’t always get to date that often.”

  “So you don’t date when traveling? You’ve never met a woman at a bar while on the road and brought her back to your room?”

  Another frown. “Did we or did we not meet when I overheard you deciding to bring some random—boring as shit, I might add—guy back to your room while you were traveling?”

  “That’s different.”

  “How?”

  “I have a good reason for not wanting anything more than sex from a man these days. Plus, I don’t do it very often.”

  Hunter said nothing. He seemed to like to argue with me, so my guess was his sudden silence was because I’d hit upon something he didn’t want to talk about. Perhaps he had his own good reasons for not wanting anything but a sexual relationship with someone.

  “So, tell me something about your love life, birthday boy who isn’t a whore. I gave you the thirty-second version of my heartache this afternoon. What’s your deal?”