Made for You Read online

  “Kyle, it’s great to see you,” I said with sincerity.

  “You too, Syd. We are stoked that the four of us are back together. It’s going to be like old times — minus the barroom brawls at three in the morning. Well, that’s if this asshole behaves.” Kyle motioned to his brother. I had forgotten about how many fights Justin used to get into at the fleabag bars we played at years ago.

  We all laughed and did a celebratory tequila shot together. Oddly, even though it had been years since we’d all seen each other, there was a warm familiarity to the four of us, as if we had picked up right where we left off.

  ***

  It didn’t take long before word must have gotten out that Double Strife was at the bar, because the bar that had been almost empty when we walked in was suddenly filled with young women. Scantily clad young women in tight clothes, eagerly salivating in Justin and Kyle’s direction, looking like wolves about to pounce on their prey.

  Sienna looked around and saw what I saw. “I see you boys don’t have to work too hard for it anymore, do you?” She smiled as she motioned for them to look around the room.

  Kyle laughed. “I never thought I’d say this, but that shit gets old. The other night Justin had a woman rip open her shirt and display a full-face picture of him tattooed on her stomach. A few years back I wouldn’t have noticed the tat, since the woman had no bra on and a set of double-d’s, but instead of checking her out I found myself looking at the artwork and thinking I should get the artist’s number.” Kyle laughed and took a swig of his beer.

  Sienna turned to Justin, intrigued. “What did you say to the woman with your face on her chest?”

  Justin went to speak, but Kyle beat him to it. “Say? He took her in the back and fucked her kneeling while she laid on the bed so he could look at himself while he gave it to her.”

  Sienna and I cracked up at Kyle’s response. I had forgotten how much the two brothers constantly busted on each other. It was one of the things that made hanging out with the two of them so entertaining. One was always trying to embarrass the other or put the other down. But it was usually all in good fun.

  I looked over at Justin and he was glaring at Kyle, obviously pissed at his brother for the story. It made me wonder whether the story was just Kyle teasing or if Justin really had slept with her.

  After a minute of angry glaring at his brother, Justin chugged his beer and slammed down the bottle. “Come on, you fucker, let’s go play a song so you shut the hell up.” Justin looked to me and Sienna, “You ladies remember the words to Gone?”

  Sienna jumped up. “Of course. I masturbated to it last week.” Her eagerness and playfulness seemed to bring Justin out of his mood.

  ***

  The hotel bar was more than happy to let us play two songs for the crowd. Although we hadn’t played anything together in years, even I had to admit we sounded good together. Justin and Kyle were more than happy to share the spotlight with Sienna and I, although I was pretty sure the mega-horde of women watching had no idea we were even in the room.

  By the time we were done, the bar was getting out of control. Swooning women were beginning to push to try to get closer to Justin and Kyle. The bar manager was kind enough to see the panic in my face and offered us a back exit through the kitchen that led us to an empty stairwell.

  We found our way downstairs and the four of us slipped outside and spent another hour lounging on chairs around the closed pool, talking about the tour. Even though we had only played two songs, we were all on a post-show high. Kyle told us about their mom coming to forty-two of their shows and we all laughed. I’d always thought it was sweet that Mrs. Smith had been the biggest supporter of her boys before they ever found success. When we were back in Boston, their mom could almost always be found during their show. She didn’t come early or linger after the show, but she was always there to support her boys.

  Eventually the conversation found its way to me and I took a few playful jabs about my decision to teach, leaving playing music for a few years. They all enjoyed taking their turn poking fun at my temporary insanity, and then the topic of Michael made its way to the forefront.

  “I have to say, Syd, I was a bit surprised that you agreed to join the tour. I would have bet that Michael would have convinced you to stay back in Boston.” Kyle spoke matter-of-factly as he took a swig from the bottle of tequila he had managed to swipe from the bar before our exit.

  Sienna responded quickly. “Dude, they broke up a few months ago. You don’t have to be so polite now. You can tell her what an asshole that man was.” She reached for the bottle as Kyle passed the tequila to her.

  Kyle laughed. “No shit. Good for you. That guy really was an uptight dick. Right, Justin, you were never a big fan?” Kyle nodded toward his brother.

  I looked to Justin for his response and found him staring at me, a cocky smile on his face. Justin arched his eyebrows in my direction and held my stare before responding.

  “Yep, never liked that asshole. Always thought he didn’t deserve Syd.” Justin responded to his brother, but never looked away from me when he spoke, his famous sexy dimpled smile never faltered.

  For some reason, his response made me nervous. I stood, needing to extract myself from the conversation and the sudden intenseness of Justin’s stare. “If you are all done talking about me as if I wasn’t actually sitting here, I think it’s time for me to go get some beauty sleep.”

  Luckily, we slipped back into the hotel without getting noticed. But I saw there were at least two dozen women being kept outside of the main lobby by security when we ducked in through the side door.

  ***

  The night before we were to check out of the hotel and start our life on tour with Double Strife, we had planned to sit down and spend a few hours going through the tour schedule and our playlists. Sienna suggested that the guys come to our room so that we could have privacy. I was a little uncomfortable having Justin in our room for some reason, but since word had gotten out that Double Strife was staying at the Chancery, the hotel was a minefield of eager fans trying to get the attention of Justin, so it only made sense to meet in one of our rooms.

  The guys arrived together and were obviously confused when they walked in to our suite. “Holy shit, what did you ladies do to get a suite like this? I’ve been sharing a suite as big as your living room with this smelly asshole for the last few nights.” Kyle laughed as he spoke.

  I was a little embarrassed and not sure how to respond. But of course I didn’t have to think about it long because Sienna, as always, was ready with a response. “Didn’t we mention that Syd’s new boyfriend is a gazillionaire and owns this hotel chain?”

  Kyle’s response was sincere. “No shit. Good for you, Syd.”

  Justin, who was usually the first one with a sarcastic response, didn’t say a word.

  We ordered dinner and, when Sienna told him our whole stay was comped by Jack, Kyle decided we needed dessert too. Before I knew it, the hours had flown by and it was almost midnight when my phone rang flashing a picture of Jack.

  I answered. “Hey.”

  “How was your day?” Jack’s voice was low and he sounded tired.

  “Really good, how about you?” I smiled at the phone and caught Justin watching me out of the corner of my eye.

  “Rough. Wish you were here with me to help work my stress out.” His voice was sexy and raspy. It sounded like he’d had a rough day and I instantly wished I was there to work the stress from his gorgeous body.

  “Mmmm. And how would I do that?” I teasingly responded, completely forgetting that I had an audience.

  “Excellent, we get to hear Syd have phone sex!” Kyle yelled in the background.

  “Who was that?” Jack’s low, sleepy voice was suddenly at attention.

  I gave Sienna and the guys the middle finger and walked to my bedroom for privacy.

  “That was Kyle, he was just kidding around. We are going over our set list.”

  “In your roo
m?” Jack’s response was short.

  “It’s already becoming difficult to find privacy. The hotel is crawling with fans since word got out they were staying here.”

  “The hotel has conference rooms, you know.”

  “We aren’t hanging out in the bedrooms, Jack. We have either been sitting at the dining room table or on the couch. It really isn’t that different than if we were in a conference room.” My reasoning sounded logical to me.

  “Who is there?”

  “Kyle, Justin, Sienna and I” As I responded, I realized that it sounded worse than it actually was. Would I want Jack hanging out with a friend and two girls in a hotel room, even if the girls were people he did business with?

  “Syd, how would you feel if the situation was reversed and it was me in a hotel room with two women and a friend?” Even thousands of miles away the man still had the ability to read my mind.

  “You’re right. I didn’t think of it that way. I wouldn’t like it at all.” I blew out a breath I didn’t realize I had been holding.

  Jack’s voice was tense. “I’ll let you go so you can finish your work before they wind up spending the night in your suite and I completely lose my fucking mind.”

  “I’m sorry, Jack. I didn’t mean to upset you. I love you.”

  “I love you too. Give me a call tomorrow.” Then Jack hung up. I felt a hollow feeling in the pit of my stomach. He had gone out of his way to make sure I felt comfortable by arranging our suite and how did I repay him? By entertaining men in it.

  I went back to the living room feeling deflated and all three of them shut up as I walked into the room. I didn’t think they could have heard my conversation. “What?” I asked, the question coming out a bit too defensive.

  Sienna went to speak, but Justin beat her to it. “I didn’t realize this hotel was part of the Heston chain, so I didn’t put two and two together until Sienna just told us who your boyfriend was.”

  I furrowed my brow, confused, waiting for the rest of the story. But Justin didn’t make me wait long for the rest. He had a sly smirk on his face as he said, “You don’t know who our tour sponsor is, do you?”

  I shook my head, further confused.

  Sienna spoke carefully, as if she was afraid to speak her words. “Heston International is the tour sponsor, Syd.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Heston is the money behind our tour, blondie. Without them, we wouldn’t have a tour. They were the ones that recommended you ladies fill in as the opening band — not that we didn’t think it was a great idea.” Justin looked at me, trying to gauge my reaction.

  It felt as though all the air had been squeezed out of my lungs. My chest grew tight and the room swayed a bit as I took in the meaning of his words.

  I lowered my head, embarrassed as I spoke. “I had no idea guys. I didn’t realize that we were bought onto this tour. “

  Justin stepped forward and lifted my chin. “Bullshit, blondie. Don’t think that for one minute. He may have opened the door for you, but there is no way in hell that we would have brought anyone on who we didn’t think was good enough. You ladies kick ass, and that’s why you are here.”

  I attempted a smile and shook my head to placate Justin. He was sweet for trying to make me feel better. I just needed to be alone and process what it all meant.

  I reached out and hugged Justin. “Thank you, Justin. You are sweet. I think I just need to get some rest and think about it with a clear head.”

  Justin nodded and the guys took the cue to leave. We agreed to meet in the lobby at 10am to board the busses in the morning. Once they were gone, I told Sienna that I had a headache and didn’t want to talk, but promised we could talk about it in the morning,

  I don’t know how long I lay in bed thinking, but the sun was coming up before I shut my eyes. My head was spinning. How could Jack stand in the background of my life acting like my puppeteer when he knew very well that I left Michael because I wanted to be my own person? Why did he want me 3,000 miles away?

  Chapter 4

  Not surprisingly, the next morning I was exhausted when Sienna woke me up with the smell of coffee and a breakfast spread large enough for eight. One of the reasons that she had been my best friend all of these years is that she never gave up on me. She’d given me my space the night before when I feigned a headache, but was not going to allow me to put her off much longer, when she knew I needed to talk about what we had learned the night before.

  By the time breakfast was over, Sienna had convinced me that however the opportunity may have been gotten, no one could succeed or fail for us. We should take it as a gift and show the world that we deserved the job we had been graciously given. I knew she was right, but it didn’t make the pain I felt from Jack’s betrayal hurt any less. I also knew what we were starting that day was no longer just about me, it was Sienna’s dream too, and had been unwaveringly since she had learned to talk. So, regardless of my hurt toward Jack, I was going to work as hard as I could with Sienna to make the tour a success.

  ***

  The three tour busses were enormous. The living arrangements for the tour used to have Kyle and Justin sharing a bus with two of the band members from the group who were dropping out, but now that Sienna and I were joining, the arrangements had been reworked so there were now separate busses for the guys and for the girls. I had wondered if we would be sharing a bus with Kyle and Justin, and I was secretly relieved that we weren’t. Somewhere in the pit of my stomach I sensed that Justin still had some feelings for me, and it would have made me uncomfortable sleeping so close to him. But after what I had learned last night, I wondered if the separate bus situation had actually been arranged by Jack.

  We loaded our luggage into our bus and Justin gave us a tour of all three. The first two held the talent, the last one held the equipment, and Justin told us that occasionally some people from the tour company or road crew would join. Justin asked us to ride along in their bus for the day so that we could finish up our playlist and talk about the next few shows.

  The back of the bus was separated by a door and held four cubbies and a private bedroom. The cubbies were each separated by a curtain and had two bunk-beds. The back bedroom was small, but it held a queen size bed without any room for walking around it.

  The front of the bus had seating arranged that made it feel like a small living room. On the right side a long leather couch faced a TV. On the left side were individual seats that could be swiveled and locked into place.

  It was nearly noon by the time we were loaded and ready. I wasn’t surprised when my phone rang just as the bus started to roll out of the hotel parking lot. It was early evening back home, and Jack usually called me after work. I looked at the phone and saw Jack’s picture. I hesitated for a minute, then pushed the button to send the call to voicemail. When I looked up I found Justin watching me, a flirty cocky smile on his face.

  ***

  By the time we arrived at our destination in Berlin, I had pushed the button to send Jack’s call to voicemail at least a half dozen times. I couldn’t explain why I was avoiding his calls, I just knew I wasn’t ready to talk to him yet. I wasn’t sure if I was afraid to find out that he wanted me somewhere else, or if I was more afraid that I had no intention of leaving him even if he was controlling my life. Whenever I thought about it, the one thing I couldn’t even let myself consider was letting him go. I was completely and utterly in love with the man and scared to death of what I would do to keep him.

  Sienna and I were both up at the crack of dawn the next morning, even though we had only fallen asleep a few hours earlier. There was an excitement in the air between us, knowing that we would be on stage in front of thousands of people for the first time in just a matter of hours.

  The bus was parked at the stadium where we would perform later that evening, and we were told that there was a car available to shuttle us locally to anyplace we needed. Sienna and I decided to go out for breakfast; it was both of our fa
vorite meal of the day. Many of our best memories came from breakfasts we’d had in diners while still being up from the night before.

  In the car on the way to the diner, Sienna squeezed my hand as I looked around, seeing Berlin for the first time.

  “He called me last night when you didn’t answer.”

  “What?” I was confused at first. “Jack?”

  “Yes, Jack, you birdbrain. Who else would I be talking to you about with kid gloves on?”

  “Did you answer?”

  “Yes.” My head snapped to Sienna, glaring at her like she had just committed the ultimate girl crime.

  “Why would you do that?”

  “Because someone needed to grow a pair.”

  I just looked at her with my mouth hanging open, speechless for a full moment. “What did you tell him?”

  “I told the truth — that you were upset because you found out that Heston was the tour sponsor,” Sienna said very matter-of-factly.

  “And what did he say?”

  “He sort of didn’t say anything. He kinda growled at me and then his exact words were, and I quote, ‘What. The. Fuck.’ She punctuated each word in the same way that I knew Jack would have, actually pausing between words to get his point across.

  I couldn’t help but smirk at her imitation of Jack. But my reaction just goaded her on.

  “Sydney. What. Would. You. Like. For. Breakfast,” she said in the same pattern that Jack would have said, What. The. Fuck. And her deep voice impression wasn’t that bad either.

  We both laughed hysterically, the first real laugh I’d had in the last twenty-four hours, which may have been a record for time spent with Sienna without laughing soda through my nose.

  Our eyes were still tearing from laughing so hard when Sienna could finally speak again. “Seriously, Syd, you know I was worried about you jumping into anything so soon after Michael, but that man fucking loves you. I know it in my bones. He wouldn’t do anything to hurt you intentionally. You need to talk to him.”